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indecadence) wrote2013-05-24 08:48 pm
indecadence) wrote2013-05-24 08:48 pm
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"I don't know what a NEXT is," he answers, resting back against his palms and stretching his legs out a little. How long were they going to be here? How long would it take for her to understand? And who would he tell about this? Would Dean care? Would anyone? "But that doesn't matter. Haven't you heard his name before?"
From the bible, maybe? Or from others who knew? It's not that uncommon.
From the bible, maybe? Or from others who knew? It's not that uncommon.
Kaede thinks about it for a moment, sitting there in silence as she thinks back over the last few days. Then, she lets out a breath and realizes she isn't sure who the last person she touched was, and decides not to show him the easy way. "NEXTs are... people with super powers, where I came from. My Dad, Barnaby, Ivan, and me... we're all NEXTs. It stands for something, but I can't remember what."
She gives a little shrug; it doesn't matter all that much to her what it means. "The Devil. Lucifer. ...But this guy's touch is cold, not... fire." She touches her throat slightly, shivering, remembering.
She gives a little shrug; it doesn't matter all that much to her what it means. "The Devil. Lucifer. ...But this guy's touch is cold, not... fire." She touches her throat slightly, shivering, remembering.
[ He doesn't want to be the voice of reason here. In fact, if anything, he wants to step into Dean's personal space and snatch that bottle away from him so he can drink too. He'd been spending a lot of his free time getting high, but that's only good for so much, more for reminiscing than numbing whatever travesty of the week it happened to be.
Castiel is so nonplussed at that smirk, rolling his eyes a little. ]
Alone? [ Call him skeptical. Besides, there's no one with him, and Dean had been banging on his door. ] Where did you get that?
[ So much for not babying him. He gets close enough to lean in and tries to snag the bottle. ]
Castiel is so nonplussed at that smirk, rolling his eyes a little. ]
Alone? [ Call him skeptical. Besides, there's no one with him, and Dean had been banging on his door. ] Where did you get that?
[ So much for not babying him. He gets close enough to lean in and tries to snag the bottle. ]
[ as if dean would have expected babying from cas. please.
he makes no effort to keep the bottle from cas, lets him have it just like that. it'll be better with cas drunk, too-- a thing dean doesn't often seek out. at the question he pauses, gives the bottle a long look and then shrugs with one shoulder. ]
No idea.
[ could be rat poison for all he cares. ]
Where were you?
he makes no effort to keep the bottle from cas, lets him have it just like that. it'll be better with cas drunk, too-- a thing dean doesn't often seek out. at the question he pauses, gives the bottle a long look and then shrugs with one shoulder. ]
No idea.
[ could be rat poison for all he cares. ]
Where were you?
[ The impassiveness he'd remarkably kept in check before slips away into something of a frown at that comment, at the general lack of normal behavior from him. All of this leaves him with no basis for anything, why Dean's this drunk and what he'd been doing seeking him out. The last time they'd drank together-- Well, those are not the best memories for comparison, and Castiel takes a second to lift the bottle up to smell its contents.
Definitely alcohol, at least. Definitely something strong. He idly takes a sip as he watches him. ]
Nowhere. [ Because it's not Dean's business where he'd been. Castiel doesn't know where they stand, even after their last conversation. It makes him wary. ] Let's talk inside.
[ And get him on a more solid surface than his own two legs. He pushes the bottle back into his hand and tries to go for the door, forcing himself closer to the other man for that purpose. Whether or not they actually make it there is another topic entirely. ]
Definitely alcohol, at least. Definitely something strong. He idly takes a sip as he watches him. ]
Nowhere. [ Because it's not Dean's business where he'd been. Castiel doesn't know where they stand, even after their last conversation. It makes him wary. ] Let's talk inside.
[ And get him on a more solid surface than his own two legs. He pushes the bottle back into his hand and tries to go for the door, forcing himself closer to the other man for that purpose. Whether or not they actually make it there is another topic entirely. ]
No.
[ nope, sorry, he's pushing off from the wall, one hand going to grab cas by the arm in an attempt to turn him right around. he's drunk, sure, but he still has somewhat of a reason for this... even if it's just seeking out company for what he's curious about, and an attempt to get sam off his mind. if he wasn't drunk, he might be doing this solo. ]
There's-- I saw something outside. You should come check it out with me-- tell me I'm not going crazy, and all. Or crazier-- [ he huffs a strained laugh. ] --than normal.
[ but see, he could have sworn he'd seen reality break outside, a rip of some sort, a window into another place. there and gone again in an instant, enough to leave him wondering if he'd just been hallucinating thanks to the bottle. ]
[ nope, sorry, he's pushing off from the wall, one hand going to grab cas by the arm in an attempt to turn him right around. he's drunk, sure, but he still has somewhat of a reason for this... even if it's just seeking out company for what he's curious about, and an attempt to get sam off his mind. if he wasn't drunk, he might be doing this solo. ]
There's-- I saw something outside. You should come check it out with me-- tell me I'm not going crazy, and all. Or crazier-- [ he huffs a strained laugh. ] --than normal.
[ but see, he could have sworn he'd seen reality break outside, a rip of some sort, a window into another place. there and gone again in an instant, enough to leave him wondering if he'd just been hallucinating thanks to the bottle. ]
[ He jerks just out of reach from the hand that tries to grab onto him, suddenly needing a steady distance between them. This is just bordering on strange, stranger now that Dean's talking about something outside, and Castiel, for all that he likes to pay attention to details, hadn't noticed anything abnormal walking back inside the dorms. ]
You're not crazy, Dean. [ Not as crazy as some, but he doesn't add that. Instead, he narrows his eyes at him. ] Tell me what you saw.
[ No way is he making this easier for either of them. He refuses to go unless he absolutely has to, and even that, at this point, is stretching it. By the end of this, he might take the bottle back from him and do something he'd regret later. Always later.
He looks at him and waits for an answer. ]
You're not crazy, Dean. [ Not as crazy as some, but he doesn't add that. Instead, he narrows his eyes at him. ] Tell me what you saw.
[ No way is he making this easier for either of them. He refuses to go unless he absolutely has to, and even that, at this point, is stretching it. By the end of this, he might take the bottle back from him and do something he'd regret later. Always later.
He looks at him and waits for an answer. ]
[ when cas manages to avoid the grab, dean pauses before taking a single step closer. why? whoever the fuck even knows. it's interesting too, that cas would need this space, when he's always been one to stand too close, linger for too long and just generally frustrate dean in every which way possible. ]
No.
[ again, rougher this time, more final. ]
I wanna show you, so come on.
[ you just try and resist him one more time. ]
No.
[ again, rougher this time, more final. ]
I wanna show you, so come on.
[ you just try and resist him one more time. ]
[ His eyebrows immediately go up at that--the step he takes, the way he pushes just a little closer. He must really be drunk, and even if he's trying to find some reason to really resist, he doesn't think he can for much longer. ]
Why? [ His mood doesn't help that he's just pushing Dean to egg him on now. ] Tell me, and I'll decide if it's worth looking into.
[ Granted, it probably is, but he has to have this. He wants it to be on his terms and not Dean's. Castiel wants to be past that part of their relationship now. ]
Why? [ His mood doesn't help that he's just pushing Dean to egg him on now. ] Tell me, and I'll decide if it's worth looking into.
[ Granted, it probably is, but he has to have this. He wants it to be on his terms and not Dean's. Castiel wants to be past that part of their relationship now. ]
[ anger has always snapped so easily within him.
dean listens to about tell me, and i'll decide before those few steps are taken as well, the movement fast and fluid for someone who is without a doubt drunk. he aims to slam cas right against the dirty wall of the hallway, easily grasps him by the shoulder, forearm pressing over cas' collar. the dust flies off like smoke from the wall, lifting with the thud.
and dean gets right in cas' face a moment later. ]
What's wrong with you, huh?
[ something's crawled up your ass and dean doesn't like it. he thought they were okay but clearly he's wrong. just like he is about everything and everyone lately. maybe cas is hiding something too, after all, it would only make sense that those closest to him are all scheming, all going behind his back, fooling him with words of things getting better--
god he could break something right now, the bottle still in his hand slowly but surely becoming a victim with the way he keeps adding pressure to it. ]
You hiding something too? Do I need to beat it outta you as well?
dean listens to about tell me, and i'll decide before those few steps are taken as well, the movement fast and fluid for someone who is without a doubt drunk. he aims to slam cas right against the dirty wall of the hallway, easily grasps him by the shoulder, forearm pressing over cas' collar. the dust flies off like smoke from the wall, lifting with the thud.
and dean gets right in cas' face a moment later. ]
What's wrong with you, huh?
[ something's crawled up your ass and dean doesn't like it. he thought they were okay but clearly he's wrong. just like he is about everything and everyone lately. maybe cas is hiding something too, after all, it would only make sense that those closest to him are all scheming, all going behind his back, fooling him with words of things getting better--
god he could break something right now, the bottle still in his hand slowly but surely becoming a victim with the way he keeps adding pressure to it. ]
You hiding something too? Do I need to beat it outta you as well?
[ It's something he should have expected, but still, even after all these years, it catches him unaware.
Castiel doesn't fight it, the initial shove shocking his body into rigidity, and when he's slammed into the wall, there's nothing but the quiet grunt of air leaving his lungs rather forcibly. When his mind catches up, he's gripping at Dean's arm and pushing a hand against his chest. It's not hard enough to deter him, but it's there to indicate he doesn't need to get any closer. ]
Would that make you feel better? [ His tone implies sarcasm. So much sarcasm, and he's glaring. ] I'm not hiding anything.
[ And with that admission, he sags a little. It might be some stretching of the truth, but Dean doesn't need to know he'd gotten himself mixed up with a demon. That things weren't making sense, and that the angels were causing too much trouble to solely contain between themselves anymore. Everything is backwards, but he's not going to say it.
He sighs almost quietly. ]
But I have every right to ask you the same. [ Where have you been? What have you been doing? Why are you so drunk? ]
Castiel doesn't fight it, the initial shove shocking his body into rigidity, and when he's slammed into the wall, there's nothing but the quiet grunt of air leaving his lungs rather forcibly. When his mind catches up, he's gripping at Dean's arm and pushing a hand against his chest. It's not hard enough to deter him, but it's there to indicate he doesn't need to get any closer. ]
Would that make you feel better? [ His tone implies sarcasm. So much sarcasm, and he's glaring. ] I'm not hiding anything.
[ And with that admission, he sags a little. It might be some stretching of the truth, but Dean doesn't need to know he'd gotten himself mixed up with a demon. That things weren't making sense, and that the angels were causing too much trouble to solely contain between themselves anymore. Everything is backwards, but he's not going to say it.
He sighs almost quietly. ]
But I have every right to ask you the same. [ Where have you been? What have you been doing? Why are you so drunk? ]
[ no it would make him feel like shit.
dean glares at him for a moment, lets the bitter anger wash over him and drive his actions like it's so easy to let. sam would have said the same, would have kept up the lies if dean hadn't found out about them. and cas could be doing the same.
could be, would be, maybe, he doesn't know-- ]
How do I know I can trust you.
[ it's said eventually, with the same weariness that sags cas' body, he feels it weigh him down, too. this is all becoming too much, and he has no idea what to do anymore. he doesn't let up though, just sways there for a moment, the burn of alcohol numbing his mind despite his best efforts to concentrate.
at least the statement gets a huff of a laugh. ]
No, no-- but Sam's another story.
dean glares at him for a moment, lets the bitter anger wash over him and drive his actions like it's so easy to let. sam would have said the same, would have kept up the lies if dean hadn't found out about them. and cas could be doing the same.
could be, would be, maybe, he doesn't know-- ]
How do I know I can trust you.
[ it's said eventually, with the same weariness that sags cas' body, he feels it weigh him down, too. this is all becoming too much, and he has no idea what to do anymore. he doesn't let up though, just sways there for a moment, the burn of alcohol numbing his mind despite his best efforts to concentrate.
at least the statement gets a huff of a laugh. ]
No, no-- but Sam's another story.
[ Something in those words snap hard and fast, and Castiel's staring pointblank at him, fingers twitching an inch before curling into the fabric of his shirt. ]
Are we having this conversation again? [ How many times will they have to suffer through it? ] I have given you everything. Your trust is the least you could give me.
[ The least. It's grit, teeth clenched but voice still relatively even as he speaks, and yet, with the mention of Sam's name, it causes him to pause. To hesitate, to stumble. He'd seen Sam not long ago, and things had been... okay. Yet, that doesn't necessarily mean anything. Whatever secrets the Winchesters keep only continues to prove that statement true.
Some sinking feeling settles in the pit of his stomach, and he hates that he has to ask. ]
What has he done now?
Are we having this conversation again? [ How many times will they have to suffer through it? ] I have given you everything. Your trust is the least you could give me.
[ The least. It's grit, teeth clenched but voice still relatively even as he speaks, and yet, with the mention of Sam's name, it causes him to pause. To hesitate, to stumble. He'd seen Sam not long ago, and things had been... okay. Yet, that doesn't necessarily mean anything. Whatever secrets the Winchesters keep only continues to prove that statement true.
Some sinking feeling settles in the pit of his stomach, and he hates that he has to ask. ]
What has he done now?
[ maybe he just doesn't know how to trust anymore. he'd placed some faith in sam, had dug it up from somewhere only to find out about sam's dates with the devil. ]
Has a deal with Lucifer. Hangs out with him, is gettin' friendly with him but that's alright, 'cause he won't say yes, he--
[ he sucks in a breath, sound pained like he's finding out about it all over again. ]
He lied, he said-- it's all going just like last time, Cas, he'll end up right where I lost him.
[ the bottle falls then, shattering on the floor in tiny pieces of glass, the insides staining the floor. but dean doesn't budge, just lingers there without looking at cas anymore, eyes downcast somewhere else as he tries to get the words out. how he could have been so fucking stupid to believe sam, to ever let him out of his sight is beyond dean.
if anything, maybe it means he's meant to lose him no matter what. ]
Has a deal with Lucifer. Hangs out with him, is gettin' friendly with him but that's alright, 'cause he won't say yes, he--
[ he sucks in a breath, sound pained like he's finding out about it all over again. ]
He lied, he said-- it's all going just like last time, Cas, he'll end up right where I lost him.
[ the bottle falls then, shattering on the floor in tiny pieces of glass, the insides staining the floor. but dean doesn't budge, just lingers there without looking at cas anymore, eyes downcast somewhere else as he tries to get the words out. how he could have been so fucking stupid to believe sam, to ever let him out of his sight is beyond dean.
if anything, maybe it means he's meant to lose him no matter what. ]
[ He'd been expecting... something else. Something not so earth-moving, something that doesn't make his heart skip a beat or his breath to catch as his throat tightens. It's not the same as when their Sam had said yes, but it's close. These events that had led them to this road are so very close and intangibly wound together that it's so difficult to pull them apart now. It explains why Dean is here, why he's drunk. Why they're such a mess standing together in the hallway.
All Castiel can think are the words Lucifer had told him before he'd snapped his neck. You will always end up here. They would, they have, and it feels like someone has ripped part of him out of his chest.
Hope. Their hope. He struggles to find the words even as the sound of the bottle breaking jars him back into reality. ]
I-- [ No, no, no. He has to try. He has to say something. ] It's not going to be like last time. We have the advantage, Dean, and nothing can change that. We know.
[ How, when, why. All of it. Their experiences simply do not mean anything, and they can fix this before Sam does something worse than making a deal with the devil. It burns through him, all that anger because he doesn't want what they have sacrificed to mean absolutely nothing or be forgotten. Castiel slides his hand from Dean's arm to his wrist. ]
This is why we're here, and this is why we trust each other. [ God knows they couldn't count on their counterparts to do anything. ] We will make it right this time.
All Castiel can think are the words Lucifer had told him before he'd snapped his neck. You will always end up here. They would, they have, and it feels like someone has ripped part of him out of his chest.
Hope. Their hope. He struggles to find the words even as the sound of the bottle breaking jars him back into reality. ]
I-- [ No, no, no. He has to try. He has to say something. ] It's not going to be like last time. We have the advantage, Dean, and nothing can change that. We know.
[ How, when, why. All of it. Their experiences simply do not mean anything, and they can fix this before Sam does something worse than making a deal with the devil. It burns through him, all that anger because he doesn't want what they have sacrificed to mean absolutely nothing or be forgotten. Castiel slides his hand from Dean's arm to his wrist. ]
This is why we're here, and this is why we trust each other. [ God knows they couldn't count on their counterparts to do anything. ] We will make it right this time.
[ Very awkward, but he doesn't want to leave it like that. ]
Thank you.
Thank you.
Yes it is.
[ Because he doesn't have a lot of people who do. ]
[ Because he doesn't have a lot of people who do. ]
[ He doesn't know what else to say to continue this strange conversation. So, when in doubt, emote. ]
:)
:)
Super powers. It's not as if the concept is peculiar in any way, humans with an extraordinary gift of something, but it isn't what he's concerned with. Castiel needs her to understand the implications behind Lucifer and what he does, why he does them. He's not an expert by any means, but he knows enough to help keep her safe--even if momentarily. So, he shakes his head a little at what she says.
"Some stories aren't always true," he offers, finding the misconception almost laughable. "What you need to know is that he's dangerous, and there are few things that could truly stop him." Some aren't even readily available to them in Zelien either. "You're lucky."
That he hadn't done more than what he had.
"Some stories aren't always true," he offers, finding the misconception almost laughable. "What you need to know is that he's dangerous, and there are few things that could truly stop him." Some aren't even readily available to them in Zelien either. "You're lucky."
That he hadn't done more than what he had.
"I know. I mean I knew before but all I did was bump into him! I even apologized... He seemed almost like, amused at first but then I saw something in the mirror and I turned around and-"
She shudders, remembering all too well what she saw. Her fingers clench tighter. "Something stared back at me when I turned around. It was huge and black with burnt wings and dark. Darker than anything. It scared me... It was like a bird that had gotten caught in fire and this was all that was left."
She shudders, remembering all too well what she saw. Her fingers clench tighter. "Something stared back at me when I turned around. It was huge and black with burnt wings and dark. Darker than anything. It scared me... It was like a bird that had gotten caught in fire and this was all that was left."
My grace.
[ Castiel has come up with his fair share of ideas lacking creativity, particularly in this season, but this is definitely the worst idea ever. How the hell does someone even share his grace in the first place -- because clearly that is what his future self is asking. Either that, or he's asking the impossible -- to give it over to him entirely.
But that would be incredibly short sighted. Stupid, even. Who even does that? ]
Is this some kind of joke?
[ Castiel has come up with his fair share of ideas lacking creativity, particularly in this season, but this is definitely the worst idea ever. How the hell does someone even share his grace in the first place -- because clearly that is what his future self is asking. Either that, or he's asking the impossible -- to give it over to him entirely.
But that would be incredibly short sighted. Stupid, even. Who even does that? ]
Is this some kind of joke?
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