Castiel can't bring himself to, instead half-turned to stare at Dean and nothing else. There's so much he wants to say, things he should explain so that it doesn't seem as if-- Well, he doesn't care what it might seem like. He curls his fingers even tighter, feeling the bite of his nails in the flesh of his palms. ]
They cornered us, and we managed to get out. But he-- [ He stops to take a breath, eyes dropping to the ground. ] If I hadn't, he would have killed me.
[ And Dean had made him promise to keep Sam safe. Even if he hadn't actually agreed, he knows he wouldn't have denied it. ]
[She whets her lips, her fingers flexing slightly. In any other world, in any other situation, she would immediately be skeptical. But the pieces fit into place far too easily.]
They got him.
[She nods slightly. Odds are, this is the jackass Dean. Which leads her easily to the next statement.]
It's probably what he would have wanted you to do.
[And what he would have done, had their positions been reversed. Hell, it's what he would have done to any random stranger, most likely. But she bites back that particular bit of commentary.
She squeezes her fingers together, the flames dying out. By the time she reaches out to put a hand on Cas's shoulder, her fingers are warm to the touch, but not scalding.]
[ He repeats it again, bitterness in the words as he pulls his eyes up just enough to look at her hand. He can feel the warmth, and maybe, at one time, it might have been comforting. But he doesn't feel comforted by this. He doesn't feel comforted by her, and he wonders if that's wrong.
If he's wrong.
Castiel takes a breath, and his entire body shudders. ]
He asked me, and I couldn't-- I didn't want to leave him there. [ And then, he's really looking at her. To her, through her. ] ... what should I do?
[ Because chances are he's going to come back, but beyond that? Castiel has no direction, is lost standing there with Fatima. He doesn't want to think about telling Sam either. He feels sick. ]
[ There's more hesitation then. Because telling Sam means he has to explain what happened, and he doesn't think he can. He still doesn't know, is still trying to process everything. And the strange thing is-- He's lost people before. He's had to suffer through it, has killed for less and with even less compassion. But Dean is different, always has been, and it's... unfair.
All of this is so unfair, and it's the first time in a long time that he finally understands why. ]
No. [ It's why he didn't make it back to campus. ] And I can't carry him.
[ Can't carry him but doesn't want to leave his body open to whatever might ravage it. It's a tough decision. ]
[Fatima stares down at Dean's body, pursing her lips. This is not something he'd like. She knows that. But sometimes, you need to put the needs of the living before the guessed-at desires of the dead.
Cas and Sam? Still alive? Still feeling, breathing, thinking creatures.
Her compassion for Dean only went so far to begin with.]
[ He lingers for several seconds after, watching the way the blood slowly leaks over the back of the seat and drips to the floor of the car. Castiel looks worse, he's certain of it, but that's not the point of this. Slowly, he shakes his head, and he feels dizzy. ]
No.
[ It seems that's all he can say.
Dean wouldn't have wanted him dragging him all the way back. He wouldn't have wanted him to get caught, to be slowed down and killed short of reaching the campus. His fingers tremble as he takes a step forward, gripping the open car door so he can lean in and touch his shoulder. Castiel makes it quick, sliding his hand down the length of Dean's unmoving arm to pull off the ring around his finger.
If he comes back, if he doesn't-- ]
We should go. [ His voice is masked over, his expression cold now. ]
[ What else can they do? When he'd died, he's certain no one had come to bury him or retrieve what was left of him. No one had mentioned finding a body, so that only leaves one assumption. Castiel eyes her. ]
I shot him in the head, Fatima. He isn't going to turn. [ He hates that it still sounds angry, that every emotion he's trying to ignore surfaces rather quickly. ] Could you —
[ Castiel lifts his hand, loosely clenching his fingers into a fist to indicate the fire he'd seen her control before. There is no question about what he thinks they should do, and once it's done, they need to move quickly. ]
[Normal people, when they're asking for a favor, ask for a cup of sugar or a few dollars. Apparently, Fatima is waste management.
Something to think about at some other time, maybe.
But maybe this is the only option. If they can't carry him away, it's better than leaving him for the vultures. That just feels undignified. And sure, she and Dean don't exactly get along but...that doesn't mean he deserves indignity.
She gives Cas an even look.]
Promise me that you'll tell Sam. That's all I ask.
[ He hardly thinks of her like that. Only-- Castiel doesn't have many options left, and he feels that, with the onslaught of night, they need to be quick about it before anything else happens. He can process this later. Maybe. ]
I will.
[ Of course he will. He wants to, and he thinks, by some strange turn of events, he has to. He looks at her carefully. ]
He deserves to know. [ Even if he hopes this is only temporary. ]
[ And he shakes his head once, forcing himself to keep the words at bay. He doesn't want to explain anymore than that. He doesn't want to tell her anything. He doesn't want to think about it. ] What are you going to do?
[She keeps herself from saying, "What he tried to do to me." It's a delicious irony, but one only she can enjoy. Because while Fatima has a nasty, vengeful streak to her, she's not a cruel person by nature. She's not some kind of demon. She has empathy and she has kindness.
And in all reality, no matter her feelings about this particular Dean, she does not rejoice in his death.
Her hands are still slimy with blood, so it's a simple matter of squeezing her fingers together, just slightly, to coax a small, fresh ooze. And then, at once, both of them are ablaze, golden light dancing off of the planes of her face as she eyes the car.]
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indecadence) wrote2013-05-24 08:48 pm
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Castiel can't bring himself to, instead half-turned to stare at Dean and nothing else. There's so much he wants to say, things he should explain so that it doesn't seem as if-- Well, he doesn't care what it might seem like. He curls his fingers even tighter, feeling the bite of his nails in the flesh of his palms. ]
They cornered us, and we managed to get out. But he-- [ He stops to take a breath, eyes dropping to the ground. ] If I hadn't, he would have killed me.
[ And Dean had made him promise to keep Sam safe. Even if he hadn't actually agreed, he knows he wouldn't have denied it. ]
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They got him.
[She nods slightly. Odds are, this is the jackass Dean. Which leads her easily to the next statement.]
It's probably what he would have wanted you to do.
[And what he would have done, had their positions been reversed. Hell, it's what he would have done to any random stranger, most likely. But she bites back that particular bit of commentary.
She squeezes her fingers together, the flames dying out. By the time she reaches out to put a hand on Cas's shoulder, her fingers are warm to the touch, but not scalding.]
You know that, right?
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[ He repeats it again, bitterness in the words as he pulls his eyes up just enough to look at her hand. He can feel the warmth, and maybe, at one time, it might have been comforting. But he doesn't feel comforted by this. He doesn't feel comforted by her, and he wonders if that's wrong.
If he's wrong.
Castiel takes a breath, and his entire body shudders. ]
He asked me, and I couldn't-- I didn't want to leave him there. [ And then, he's really looking at her. To her, through her. ] ... what should I do?
[ Because chances are he's going to come back, but beyond that? Castiel has no direction, is lost standing there with Fatima. He doesn't want to think about telling Sam either. He feels sick. ]
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You need to tell Sam.
[Sorry, Cas.]
Does the car have any gas?
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All of this is so unfair, and it's the first time in a long time that he finally understands why. ]
No. [ It's why he didn't make it back to campus. ] And I can't carry him.
[ Can't carry him but doesn't want to leave his body open to whatever might ravage it. It's a tough decision. ]
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Cas and Sam? Still alive? Still feeling, breathing, thinking creatures.
Her compassion for Dean only went so far to begin with.]
I'll help you.
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No.
[ It seems that's all he can say.
Dean wouldn't have wanted him dragging him all the way back. He wouldn't have wanted him to get caught, to be slowed down and killed short of reaching the campus. His fingers tremble as he takes a step forward, gripping the open car door so he can lean in and touch his shoulder. Castiel makes it quick, sliding his hand down the length of Dean's unmoving arm to pull off the ring around his finger.
If he comes back, if he doesn't-- ]
We should go. [ His voice is masked over, his expression cold now. ]
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[That raises a few red flags. Both based on what she knows about Cas and what she knows about the world of the supernatural.
But how to put it delicately?]
What if he's going to...turn?
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I shot him in the head, Fatima. He isn't going to turn. [ He hates that it still sounds angry, that every emotion he's trying to ignore surfaces rather quickly. ] Could you —
[ Castiel lifts his hand, loosely clenching his fingers into a fist to indicate the fire he'd seen her control before. There is no question about what he thinks they should do, and once it's done, they need to move quickly. ]
no subject
Something to think about at some other time, maybe.
But maybe this is the only option. If they can't carry him away, it's better than leaving him for the vultures. That just feels undignified. And sure, she and Dean don't exactly get along but...that doesn't mean he deserves indignity.
She gives Cas an even look.]
Promise me that you'll tell Sam. That's all I ask.
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I will.
[ Of course he will. He wants to, and he thinks, by some strange turn of events, he has to. He looks at her carefully. ]
He deserves to know. [ Even if he hopes this is only temporary. ]
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Hopefully, Cas won't tell Dean when he comes back.
Because he's going to come back.]
Okay. Check the car's tank. If it's full, get as far away as possible right now.
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It's empty. We were looking for more when--
[ And he shakes his head once, forcing himself to keep the words at bay. He doesn't want to explain anymore than that. He doesn't want to tell her anything. He doesn't want to think about it. ] What are you going to do?
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And in all reality, no matter her feelings about this particular Dean, she does not rejoice in his death.
Her hands are still slimy with blood, so it's a simple matter of squeezing her fingers together, just slightly, to coax a small, fresh ooze. And then, at once, both of them are ablaze, golden light dancing off of the planes of her face as she eyes the car.]