[ it's mutual, it's so mutual it has dean ready to burst. and with that need, the burning under his skin would leave his hands shaking if they weren't plastered to cas. this is overwhelming, from the fact that he's getting down to it, that it's another man, to the most terrifying fact of it being cas' body laid out for him, cas' hand wrapped around him.
yes, you are.
he wants to breathe it into cas' mouth, lick it against cas' tongue, because he is. he's teasing him just by existing right now, just by being there, and dean doesn't know what to do about it. there are too many options, too much he wants, and where he's usually so good at just taking, all of what he knows is falling into darkness now, clouded by his body being in overdrive.
and the blame is on cas.
then, cas is sliding a hand over his hips, pushing away at fabric, groping at his ass, spreading himself out, and stroking harder-- ]
Fuck, fuck-- easy, easy...
[ so fast, too fast. this is all gonna end too soon if cas keeps the pace up. wrapping a hand over cas' wrist, he stills the jerking despite how he knows he could ride that alone to a finish. but it'd be lonely, and they're only just getting started here. he wants this to last for now, if only because neither of them know if this'll happen again. ]
I got you.
[ hands at either sides of cas' hips, dean unbuttons the front of cas' jeans with an easy flick of his hand. he can feel the too-hot heat of him just beneath the fabric, knows this is getting to cas as much as it is to him... and while there would be mercy in just letting him free, in tugging out castiel's dick, instead dean palms roughly over the hard shape, gropes at him through the front of his pants. if cas is allowed to tease, so is dean.
he's dipped lower too, mouth further down away from cas', biting and sucking a mark into cas' collar bone, then slipping more... right until he's dragging teeth over a nipple. it isn't until then that dean's pulling away at the band of his boxers too, freeing cas, and letting fingers ghost over the length of him. almost careful, he barely touches, only hovers-- right until he's biting down, just beneath cas' chest, hard and bruising. ]
[ It's a sharp, short whine when he presses his hand down and doesn't bother to really touch him. Castiel distantly thinks this is teasing. Not the promise of what he will do or what he has done, but the underlying message that all of this had been sitting there for years without any thought of having it. It's distinct knowledge now, blatant in the wake of those fingers cupping him through the material of his jeans and the mouth gliding over his neck and collar. The teeth at his nipple cause him to jerk and arch hard against him, the blunt press of his fingernails obvious in the flesh of the hand curled around his wrist. Perhaps it should be drawn out, perhaps it should be slow.
But his body is strung tight already, screaming with want. Too much to contain, and he feels like bursting with the thought of it.
His skin sings where Dean licks and touches and bites, and he shudders, moans out his name again in a breathless little plea that doesn't do much at all except ignite the want already pooling low in his belly. Castiel spreads his legs a little more, clutching at him and twisting his hips in an obvious show of here right here touch me here. There's this moment, and there will be more after. But he needs to satisfy that initial craving, needs to peak them both before it can really start. ]
It's okay. [ A soft grunt, and he pushes into that hard bite, shivering with the pain and reeling with the pleasure of it. ] It's-- I've got you too.
[ Always has, always would.
A gentle shake, and Castiel curls his hand forward, rocking his own body up so that his dick grazes the edge of Dean's hip. He smothers the sound It instigates in him, rolling forward again until he's right against him, and his fingers slide around both their cocks, taking hold and lightly stroking what he can grip. The sensation is almost overbearing, hot and throbbing exactly where he needs it to ease. His thumb slides over the head, Dean's and his own, then circles down into another short stroke, and his breath is ragged now, crushed under the weight of how quickly all of this is building, how things have changed so much for them in the course of a few weeks. ]
Please-- [ A deeper moan, and his other hand is slipping into Dean's hair, tugging and pulling to get him to come up so he can kiss him again. ]
[ if they weren't busy with this, if he could think a single coherent thought, dean might have to bail on those words alone. there's meaning in them, deep and understanding, more than he deserves from cas...
it only gets something of a whine right then though, a sound he wouldn't be caught dead making otherwise, yet one cas draws so easily from him then.
with cas' idea of easy being to take them both in his hand, it's cutting dean's will power in half, a sharp moan, pressed into cas' skin. but instead of putting an end to it, dean finds his hands wrapping around cas', fingers loose and moving wit him. the pressure is just right, the short jerks perfect even if it takes dean every bit of effort not to roll his hips, to thrust himself through the hot grip.
pressure builds blindingly fast, has him sensing the imminent end of this, that climax which would normally be his one and only goal. he can't remember the last time he particularly cared about his partner getting off, or their pleasure, never mind drawing things out and wanting them to last. but he does now, yet his body hasn't apparently gotten the memo. ]
Cas--
[ it's a grunt, muffled as he bites at castiel's mouth, presses himself every inch against cas' body, chest to chest, skin on skin. his other hands come back up, too, lingers at his shoulder then slides up to the side of his neck. he cradles cas' jaw, the side of his face, feels stubble and the angles of bone and cheek...
he could spend time just touching him, mapping out everything he's so familiar with seeing but not touching.
but not now, not with the building pressure almost there despite how dean doesn't want to tumble over the edge, not quite yet. ]
[ If it's more than he deserves, then Castiel deserves even less.
Still, he wants him to move, and he wants him to roll his hips. He wants him to use him until he can't see straight and the only thing he's able to do is barely breathe. He can feel how close he is, fingers gliding easy over them from the mixture of fluid gathering, and he resists the urge to withdraw, taste what he thinks he might possibly be missing. It's all the same, he supposes, but it's Dean, and that's infinitely different than someone else's or his own. A deeper sigh, and he stretches out even more, the heel of his foot pushing against Dean's lower thigh to encourage him to thrust. Move, do something. Touch him even more than the simple hold he has on the hand pressing them together.
Cock to cock, and he can't even imagine what it would feel like having him stretching him open. To actually- - Castiel's breath rushes from him in a sharp gasp. He can't think about that now. Absolutely can't. ]
I, I have you. [ It's low, licked into the corner of Dean's mouth in a hard kiss, warmth spreading across his belly and causing him to shudder, to jerk against him.
He reaches up to absently, instinctively dig the fingers of his other hand into the bright imprint of that mark scarred into his skin for a better grip. It's like sliding home, lining up and taking what he'd been ordered to free to keep for his very own. Castiel burns with it, a flash of memory in the depths of Hell and clawing his way to the surface, and he clutches at him, grinds against him and strokes faster. He presses his mouth to his cheek, draws him in as he breathes the words oh so quietly to him. ]
I've always had you.
[ And now it's this, now it's them. He makes a noise in the back of his throat and mumbles please please please into the kiss he gives him, biting into his lip and hanging just over the edge. Waiting for him. ]
[ dean's hand works roughly around both of them, nothing gentle about the grip, all intent and purpose. he's used to lonely nights with just his hand, has been fine with them right until this moment. from now on, he knows-- nothing will be enough again, that going about this solo will ever be okay again.
a part of him hates this change, that cas has made him weaker.
not that it registers now, or has him pulling away. if anything, the thought alone makes dean press impossibly closer, hips working a growing, urgent rhythm. ]
Cas, Cas--
[ the chant is quiet as dean's breath stutters, leaves him with a moan.
dean remotely feels cas' hand sliding up his shoulder, but it's when that familiar hand locks over an ever-present mark in his skin, when cas whispers i've always had you, which tugs at him somewhere deep, pulls at his very soul in the way cas must have when he'd raised him from hell all those years ago. it's simple, the words, but he feels them burn inside of him, shoving him right over the edge. where dean's mouth was spread messily over cas', he's now biting down on the side of cas' upper neck, muffling the deep sound which escapes him as it all crashes around him. pleasure numbs his entire body for those blissful, drawn out seconds which drive his hips to roll against the grip around their cocks-- spilling himself over his hand, over cas' lower body, marking and staining.
breathing heavy, he's buried his face against cas' skin, hand unmoving, body on fire with warmth, with the release of pleasure pooling in his stomach, relaxing his bone, his entire being. cas has left him blissfully content, even if only for now.
and finished him much faster than dean ever fucking remembers coming. fuck. ]
[ He encourages it, whatever he gives him, and even through the roughness, through the bites and the hard grip he has on his dick, Castiel pushes past it. He licks at his mouth, digging his fingers into the flesh of his arm and holding tight, working him through his orgasm when it hits and shuddering beneath him as his own tips and sways. Closer, teasing. The warmth soaking into him seems to do it though, a final shove that punches a harsh groan out of him as his body takes over and locks up.
Castiel wraps himself around Dean, curling his leg tighter against his hip as his hand slides from his arm to the back of his head. He breathes against that mouth, panting out what might have been his name as he slides through the pleasure. Just something soft, quiet as he rocks and leans and rubs against him to draw it out. It's less than a minute, but it feels so much longer, unwinding and falling into place against him.
He allows his hand to fall away, shivering a little with the lack of the contact. Absently, he wipes his fingers clean and pushes to cup the back of the other man's neck so he cradles him in both hands. ]
Dean--
[ It's quiet, a murmur that's only meant to be shared between the two of them, and despite having Dean's face pressed against him, Castiel turns his head to kiss at his forehead. Whatever he can reach, he presses his mouth to, and it's as if something heavy has lifted from them, welding them together. Strong and inseparable. It's a terrifying notion, unsure if he can give Dean what he should be given before it gets to be too much and he runs from it.
Like he always does.
But rather than focus on those things, on the thoughts threatening to swim in his head through the aftermath, he shifts and stretches against him, a lazy roll of his hips to push them together again. If he thinks this is over, perhaps he should reconsider. Castiel has only taken the edge off. ]
[ through the haze, dean feels cas tighten up, groan loud and it feeds that still glowing pleasure in dean-- knowing cas is experiencing this with him. he drinks in the sounds, quiet breaths pressed into cas' skin as answer, feeling the way cas' body pulses. it's all so hot, but for right now he just wants to stay in this moment with him, now that they've finally gotten this far.
it's a little scary, but dean doesn't have the mind to think about it just yet.
fingers push against the back of his neck, and dean feels the shape of lips on his forehead, morphing the moment into something warm, content and happy. he could get used to this, knows he shouldn't, but for now it's so good, so nice-- nicer than anything he's shared with someone before.
naturally, it would be cas.
slowly, he looks at him, green finding blue, the lazy roll hitting him just right, has dean breathing a quiet groan. ]
[ Maybe it is scary, but there are some things he hasn't allowed himself to feel to a degree. Given that he's so powerless now, the fear is nothing but a normal emotion anymore, and he accepts it with all the understanding he's gained and all the knowledge that's crammed into the mortal shell he is.
If that means this uncertainty and what any of it could possibly bring in the future, so be it.
The look, for all that it is and what it might be, causes him to smile, and he lets out a breath, something soft and quiet as he nudges his cheek with his nose and kisses him again. Once, twice. The third is directly on his lips, and despite the desire for more, he also doesn't want to ruin this moment. He wants to keep it, cradle it close and never let it go. ]
You. [ Castiel hums the word. ] I want you.
[ It's a line. He knows it's a line, and it would probably be utterly lame if not for the sincerity behind it. For as long as he can manage it, he wants all of this. At peace, for once, with the guilt and overbearing weight of uselessness. Selfish to keep what he's never had and can't seem to get enough of now that's he tasted it. Even after all this time, Dean is still teaching him and still surprising him.
He leans in and pulls him down. i want you closer ]
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indecadence) wrote2013-05-24 08:48 pm
no subject
yes, you are.
he wants to breathe it into cas' mouth, lick it against cas' tongue, because he is. he's teasing him just by existing right now, just by being there, and dean doesn't know what to do about it. there are too many options, too much he wants, and where he's usually so good at just taking, all of what he knows is falling into darkness now, clouded by his body being in overdrive.
and the blame is on cas.
then, cas is sliding a hand over his hips, pushing away at fabric, groping at his ass, spreading himself out, and stroking harder-- ]
Fuck, fuck-- easy, easy...
[ so fast, too fast. this is all gonna end too soon if cas keeps the pace up. wrapping a hand over cas' wrist, he stills the jerking despite how he knows he could ride that alone to a finish. but it'd be lonely, and they're only just getting started here. he wants this to last for now, if only because neither of them know if this'll happen again. ]
I got you.
[ hands at either sides of cas' hips, dean unbuttons the front of cas' jeans with an easy flick of his hand. he can feel the too-hot heat of him just beneath the fabric, knows this is getting to cas as much as it is to him... and while there would be mercy in just letting him free, in tugging out castiel's dick, instead dean palms roughly over the hard shape, gropes at him through the front of his pants. if cas is allowed to tease, so is dean.
he's dipped lower too, mouth further down away from cas', biting and sucking a mark into cas' collar bone, then slipping more... right until he's dragging teeth over a nipple. it isn't until then that dean's pulling away at the band of his boxers too, freeing cas, and letting fingers ghost over the length of him. almost careful, he barely touches, only hovers-- right until he's biting down, just beneath cas' chest, hard and bruising. ]
no subject
[ It's a sharp, short whine when he presses his hand down and doesn't bother to really touch him. Castiel distantly thinks this is teasing. Not the promise of what he will do or what he has done, but the underlying message that all of this had been sitting there for years without any thought of having it. It's distinct knowledge now, blatant in the wake of those fingers cupping him through the material of his jeans and the mouth gliding over his neck and collar. The teeth at his nipple cause him to jerk and arch hard against him, the blunt press of his fingernails obvious in the flesh of the hand curled around his wrist. Perhaps it should be drawn out, perhaps it should be slow.
But his body is strung tight already, screaming with want. Too much to contain, and he feels like bursting with the thought of it.
His skin sings where Dean licks and touches and bites, and he shudders, moans out his name again in a breathless little plea that doesn't do much at all except ignite the want already pooling low in his belly. Castiel spreads his legs a little more, clutching at him and twisting his hips in an obvious show of here right here touch me here. There's this moment, and there will be more after. But he needs to satisfy that initial craving, needs to peak them both before it can really start. ]
It's okay. [ A soft grunt, and he pushes into that hard bite, shivering with the pain and reeling with the pleasure of it. ] It's-- I've got you too.
[ Always has, always would.
A gentle shake, and Castiel curls his hand forward, rocking his own body up so that his dick grazes the edge of Dean's hip. He smothers the sound It instigates in him, rolling forward again until he's right against him, and his fingers slide around both their cocks, taking hold and lightly stroking what he can grip. The sensation is almost overbearing, hot and throbbing exactly where he needs it to ease. His thumb slides over the head, Dean's and his own, then circles down into another short stroke, and his breath is ragged now, crushed under the weight of how quickly all of this is building, how things have changed so much for them in the course of a few weeks. ]
Please-- [ A deeper moan, and his other hand is slipping into Dean's hair, tugging and pulling to get him to come up so he can kiss him again. ]
no subject
it only gets something of a whine right then though, a sound he wouldn't be caught dead making otherwise, yet one cas draws so easily from him then.
with cas' idea of easy being to take them both in his hand, it's cutting dean's will power in half, a sharp moan, pressed into cas' skin. but instead of putting an end to it, dean finds his hands wrapping around cas', fingers loose and moving wit him. the pressure is just right, the short jerks perfect even if it takes dean every bit of effort not to roll his hips, to thrust himself through the hot grip.
pressure builds blindingly fast, has him sensing the imminent end of this, that climax which would normally be his one and only goal. he can't remember the last time he particularly cared about his partner getting off, or their pleasure, never mind drawing things out and wanting them to last. but he does now, yet his body hasn't apparently gotten the memo. ]
Cas--
[ it's a grunt, muffled as he bites at castiel's mouth, presses himself every inch against cas' body, chest to chest, skin on skin. his other hands come back up, too, lingers at his shoulder then slides up to the side of his neck. he cradles cas' jaw, the side of his face, feels stubble and the angles of bone and cheek...
he could spend time just touching him, mapping out everything he's so familiar with seeing but not touching.
but not now, not with the building pressure almost there despite how dean doesn't want to tumble over the edge, not quite yet. ]
no subject
Still, he wants him to move, and he wants him to roll his hips. He wants him to use him until he can't see straight and the only thing he's able to do is barely breathe. He can feel how close he is, fingers gliding easy over them from the mixture of fluid gathering, and he resists the urge to withdraw, taste what he thinks he might possibly be missing. It's all the same, he supposes, but it's Dean, and that's infinitely different than someone else's or his own. A deeper sigh, and he stretches out even more, the heel of his foot pushing against Dean's lower thigh to encourage him to thrust. Move, do something. Touch him even more than the simple hold he has on the hand pressing them together.
Cock to cock, and he can't even imagine what it would feel like having him stretching him open. To actually- - Castiel's breath rushes from him in a sharp gasp. He can't think about that now. Absolutely can't. ]
I, I have you. [ It's low, licked into the corner of Dean's mouth in a hard kiss, warmth spreading across his belly and causing him to shudder, to jerk against him.
He reaches up to absently, instinctively dig the fingers of his other hand into the bright imprint of that mark scarred into his skin for a better grip. It's like sliding home, lining up and taking what he'd been ordered to free to keep for his very own. Castiel burns with it, a flash of memory in the depths of Hell and clawing his way to the surface, and he clutches at him, grinds against him and strokes faster. He presses his mouth to his cheek, draws him in as he breathes the words oh so quietly to him. ]
I've always had you.
[ And now it's this, now it's them. He makes a noise in the back of his throat and mumbles please please please into the kiss he gives him, biting into his lip and hanging just over the edge. Waiting for him. ]
no subject
a part of him hates this change, that cas has made him weaker.
not that it registers now, or has him pulling away. if anything, the thought alone makes dean press impossibly closer, hips working a growing, urgent rhythm. ]
Cas, Cas--
[ the chant is quiet as dean's breath stutters, leaves him with a moan.
dean remotely feels cas' hand sliding up his shoulder, but it's when that familiar hand locks over an ever-present mark in his skin, when cas whispers i've always had you, which tugs at him somewhere deep, pulls at his very soul in the way cas must have when he'd raised him from hell all those years ago. it's simple, the words, but he feels them burn inside of him, shoving him right over the edge. where dean's mouth was spread messily over cas', he's now biting down on the side of cas' upper neck, muffling the deep sound which escapes him as it all crashes around him. pleasure numbs his entire body for those blissful, drawn out seconds which drive his hips to roll against the grip around their cocks-- spilling himself over his hand, over cas' lower body, marking and staining.
breathing heavy, he's buried his face against cas' skin, hand unmoving, body on fire with warmth, with the release of pleasure pooling in his stomach, relaxing his bone, his entire being. cas has left him blissfully content, even if only for now.
and finished him much faster than dean ever fucking remembers coming. fuck. ]
no subject
Castiel wraps himself around Dean, curling his leg tighter against his hip as his hand slides from his arm to the back of his head. He breathes against that mouth, panting out what might have been his name as he slides through the pleasure. Just something soft, quiet as he rocks and leans and rubs against him to draw it out. It's less than a minute, but it feels so much longer, unwinding and falling into place against him.
He allows his hand to fall away, shivering a little with the lack of the contact. Absently, he wipes his fingers clean and pushes to cup the back of the other man's neck so he cradles him in both hands. ]
Dean--
[ It's quiet, a murmur that's only meant to be shared between the two of them, and despite having Dean's face pressed against him, Castiel turns his head to kiss at his forehead. Whatever he can reach, he presses his mouth to, and it's as if something heavy has lifted from them, welding them together. Strong and inseparable. It's a terrifying notion, unsure if he can give Dean what he should be given before it gets to be too much and he runs from it.
Like he always does.
But rather than focus on those things, on the thoughts threatening to swim in his head through the aftermath, he shifts and stretches against him, a lazy roll of his hips to push them together again. If he thinks this is over, perhaps he should reconsider. Castiel has only taken the edge off. ]
no subject
it's a little scary, but dean doesn't have the mind to think about it just yet.
fingers push against the back of his neck, and dean feels the shape of lips on his forehead, morphing the moment into something warm, content and happy. he could get used to this, knows he shouldn't, but for now it's so good, so nice-- nicer than anything he's shared with someone before.
naturally, it would be cas.
slowly, he looks at him, green finding blue, the lazy roll hitting him just right, has dean breathing a quiet groan. ]
Tell me what you want.
[ and he'll try to make it so. ]
no subject
If that means this uncertainty and what any of it could possibly bring in the future, so be it.
The look, for all that it is and what it might be, causes him to smile, and he lets out a breath, something soft and quiet as he nudges his cheek with his nose and kisses him again. Once, twice. The third is directly on his lips, and despite the desire for more, he also doesn't want to ruin this moment. He wants to keep it, cradle it close and never let it go. ]
You. [ Castiel hums the word. ] I want you.
[ It's a line. He knows it's a line, and it would probably be utterly lame if not for the sincerity behind it. For as long as he can manage it, he wants all of this. At peace, for once, with the guilt and overbearing weight of uselessness. Selfish to keep what he's never had and can't seem to get enough of now that's he tasted it. Even after all this time, Dean is still teaching him and still surprising him.
He leans in and pulls him down. i want you closer ]